And this is what usually happens when I try to "journal" or in this case blog. I do a couple of days really well and then, boom! Nothing! I get the idea in my head and all these thoughts that are begging to be let out and then I find the media to do it and they all vanish into thin air. Seriously annoying.
Maybe if I try to list out my ideas they'll come back to me... Think, think, think...?
Write about: the kids, maybe the cats, my home, my relationships, stress (which alone could probably keep me going forever...), joy, faith, stuff...
So now at least I have a list of things to look back to. That is better than any paper journal I ever started.
Okay... Completely unrelated is this stupid publishing stuff... It doesn't auto-cap my words. I'm not used to having to shift every time I start a new sentence or type the word "I"... Annoying!!!
Back on track though. Since I've started this I've actually found myself kind of coming back to life. I know part of it is a medical thing that is finally getting straightened out, but I also think it's been a bit of a "I refuse to feel lousy" thing as well...
Since having the twins, I've been very out of sorts with myself. I've been getting sick a lot. I have gained a bunch of weight which has caused some minor medical stuff. I've hit some emotional lows. I've felt incredibly lonely and quite frankly I've been wallowing in the muck... Not a good place to be. But we've been planing this trip to Hawaii in the summer and I'm actually really looking forward to it. It's the first thing in a very long time that I have truly wanted to do. Now not only do I have something to look forward to but I also have a goal!
So a little bit of discipline in the writing aspect is spilling over into the life stuff. I've been able to get house stuff done. I've been back to the gym. I've been more willing to spend time with my kids instead of hiding from them. And ever so slowly I'm feeling myself return to a proper place! Prayers that it will continue and blossom!!! ~L
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